Turning over the leaf

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Life throws us many curve balls. Some are minor, some are major, and some are just unexpected pit stops in our journey to success. This year I was thrown many curve balls. I got distracted, I got depressed, I even got down on my luck. I start picking up bad habits and falling back into old ways. Throughout it all. God still kept his hand covered over me, even when I didn’t deserve it. I can honestly say that no matter my downfalls, I still made it through, and I exceeded past every obstacle. Most times in life when we know we are not living right, and we are fully aware of it we tend to live in guilt, wondering when the next boulder will fall on top of our heads, but as I’ve grown I’ve learned that we can not think that way. We are humans, humans that have the ability to create our own realities. Due to our trial and errors we are given yet another chance to make amends, and be better than before. We have to numb ourselves of all the pain and negativity, and just push pass it all to reach our goals. If you want to live better, than do better. Once again we have the ability to change our mindsets from “I can’t”, to “Yes the fuck I can”. We have to stop being afraid of defeat and claim our victory. I’m also learning that there has never been a better time to turn over the leaf in our lives, and try something new. It’s time to be innovative, think differently, live differently. Odds are, most people who feel unhappy, simply do nothing real to change their state of emotion. If we tried just a little harder to appeal to our spirits instead of our flesh, we would really see the difference in our well being. So turning over the leaf? What’s that mean? We’ve tried the New Years resolutions, and that’s normally thrown out the window by the end of the week. Let’s try something more, how about setting the tone each week, day, month with a goal that will keep you aligned on your plan of living righteously. Rather its’ monthly, weekly, bi-weekly, start by acknowledging things in your life that are not suiting you and pin-point it to change it. If we never face our skeletons we will always live in fear, but if we aim to finally fight against these transgressions, we will prevail and conquer the enemy once and for all. Sometimes you just really have to step out of faith, and trust God and his mission to lead your life, but you have to be willing to change habits and make living right a priority. It’s always easier said than done, but you only have one life to live, and so many chances. Let’s work together to make the best of this journey, I invite all who read this to walk with me as I practice healthier living spiritually, physically, mentally, and emotionally. It’s just time to be great, and God is waiting for you to walk into your blessings. If there is anything that is bothering you, haunting you, and just simply tugging you do away with it and let God wipe away all your tears. It’s time to be GREAT, believe in yourself and all that you are capable of, and God will handle the rest.

Sacrifice 


Sometimes you have to sacrifice to gain. This week I began to fast for the Lord because all I’ve ever done is make a thousand mistakes yet he’s redeemed me everytime. This last mistake was quite terrible, & id normally revert to regret and shame, but this time God but on my heart to fast. Now I’ve never really fasted, well at least not successfully. So I knew this would be a challenge. After I sinned for the hundredth time I knew I had to do something different to turn from my selfish, ignorant ways. God loves us so much that he’d forgive us till our very last breath, he cleansess our mind and body. So what is a simple sacrifice of food or a habit of ours to merely compensate for all the wrong we’ve ever done to him. This is my second day of fasting and though it’s very difficult I’ve never had so much peace of mind, & I swear God is speaking to me clearer than ever. Sometimes God allows sin to happen to bring us unto salvation, & grant us new beginnings. Sometimes all Gods wants is to see if we are truly willing to sacrifice, yet he sacrificed his son so that we would be able to come to him and allow him to wash away all our sins. 

Fire

Ashes burn as I inhale your scornful words, your judgements slurs. Your eyes cut into my soul, as I try to avoid your stare. Your neglect ignites the fire that burns in my pores, as I try to put it out. The smoke clouds my surroundings as you confuse my soul, into playing your dirty games. I try to put you out with anything I can find. I stop, drop, and roll to stop the fire that attaches to my skin. I run and run away from your toxins as I find my cool deep cave of serenity and peace. I shall hide there until the fire is out. I shall find my peace and water the hot ground. I inhale your poison yet my lungs work their hardest to push you out. I fall to the ground with exhaustion, but never shall I gain defeat for I have watered the very ground you set on fire. 

The fight of sin 

Where do we draw the line? God gives us so many chances, each and every day sin after sin, and then some always issuing us more get out of jail free cards even though we don’t deserve it. It’s get to a point where we as humans abuse our free will by choosing sin. I’ve realized going back and forth, back and forth, back and forth is like poison to our spirits. It throws and shifts our whole equilibrium off, and when things start happening that’s not in our best interest, we get upset and call on God even though it was our own doing. Sin is an addiction like none other. Better yet sin is addiction, it is the clinging of bad spirits and habits that ultimately aim to destroy us. Time after time I’ve built myself up spiritually, only to fall weak at the hands of temptation, letting myself down every time. By the grace of God I love that he loves me unconditionally, and will continue to forgive and strengthen me all of my days. Because of this grace we take God for granted, I’ve done it so many times, I feel as if I’ve used up all of my get out of jail free cards. God is a forgiving God, but we as his children have to take charge and cut ourselves off from sin. We have to really want to dig deep inside to figure out what is causing us to easily fall off track, to turn away from righteousness. This past year I’ve been battling some heavy demons inside of myself, when in seclusion I would be strong as a rock, but when around others I would easily fall in temptation. Each time I would tell myself you have to fight harder! Soon enough I found this as a repeat of the same ole record. Deep down inside I know that my spirit so desperately wants to be free of this sin, she screams to me at times for me to stop hurting myself. So the question is how do we stop these demons dead in their tracks? How can we just throw in the towel and walk away? We owe to it God to make that much of a sacrifice especially since he continually does that for us everyday! Of course it’s easier said than done, but God has the power to strengthen us to fight against these demons we’re consumed by. As 2017 is taking place this is a great time to look into yourself and recognize what’s hurting you, & ask God to remove it from your spirit. Sometimes we carry so much baggage we don’t even realize how light our spirit really is. God knows our faults and our weaknesses and what I’ve realized is that we can’t just stop ourselves from sin, we have to allow God to come in and block out our transgressions. We are weak but in the lord we have all power. Shake yourself of these negative energies, people, habits, addictions, hurt, confusion, remorse, regret, etc and allow God to work. All God wants to see is that there is a fight in you! We have to continue to build ourselves up stronger each time we fall, so we may stand strong against the enemy and finally win the war. Victory is inside of every last one of us, and recognizing our downfalls is the first step to walking into a new life. 

healthy mind= healthy body

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Working out isn’t the easy task to complete in our busy chaotic lives, but over the years God has revealed to me how vital it is to become one with mind and body. Recently I fell off track with my normal workout routines, and eating habits. On top of that I caroused in social activities such as drinking. Soon thereafter I began to feel sick and down. This soon led to me feeling resentment for my previous actions. I realized that when you fall off track from seeking your ultimate goal, you retract back to old habits that cause sluggardness, procrastination, sexual immorality, depression, and unhealthy eating habits, and our spirit suffers even more affecting our mind. When our spirit is not being fulfilled due to our distractions, it tends to send us signals through our body such as sickness or stress induced reactions. Long story short, after my pitfall I began to recuperate, and get back on track because I knew I could not soak in misery.When I went back to the gym after a 2 week recession, I gain 15 pounds! I was so shocked, even though I noticed my stomach being bloated from my bad food choices and alcohol. I then told myself I will not go back to this place, of practically poisoning my body excessively after going so long without giving in. I aim for good health, because your body is the shell of the mind and you have to protect its brilliance. It is important that we all aim for our absolute best, and striving for a healthy body that doesn’t consume itself with the filth of the world is the best choice. I know everyone has their setbacks and obstacles, but it is possible to push through to be the best “you”, your mind is capable of.

Check out my latest vlog!

Many people suffer from anxiety and overthinking everyday, I too was a victim of this terrible disease. In this video I will discuss how God’s saving grave cured me from this detrimental war I was having towards myself. Feelings of being alone, worry, doubt, fear, seclusiveness, being anxious, and many more are just some of the characteristics that describe this harmful mental disorder. One thing many people fail to realize is that there are people out there battling the same exact situations, and we want to HELP. You don’t not have to deal with internal issues alone.